Is Marriage Becoming Obsolete?

Dear Crosswalkers,

We are in a great series of studies on the fantastic subject of God’s blessings.  Any reading of the Bible has to conclude that God wants to bless his people.  In the month of February we are focusing on God’s particular blessing in relationships.  Last week, we saw that all healthy relationships are based on the biblical virtues of humility, authenticity, showing honor, acceptance and forgiveness.  We also saw how unhealthy and dysfunctional tendencies such as codependency can be overcome.

This week we will look at “How to have a Healthy Marriage.”  Our culture is clearly moving away from placing a high value on marriage.  A recent study by the Pew Research Center, in association with Time magazine, indicates that four out of every ten people say marriage is becoming obsolete.  This is a marked increase from 1978, when 28% said marriage was no longer needed or desired.

According to the study, about 29 percent of children under 18 now live with a parent or parents who are unwed or no longer married.  This is a fivefold increase from 1960.  Broken down further, about 15 percent have parents who are divorced or separated and 14 percent who were never married. Within those two groups, a sizable chunk — 6 percent — have parents who are live-in couples who opted to raise kids together without getting married.

Here’s what an Associated Press story reported:

"Marriage is still very important in this country, but it doesn't dominate family life like it used to," said Andrew Cherlin, a professor of sociology and public policy at Johns Hopkins University. "Now there are several ways to have a successful family life, and more people accept them."  Still, the study indicates that marriage isn't going to disappear anytime soon. Despite a growing view that marriage may not be necessary, 67 percent of Americans were upbeat about the future of marriage and family. That's higher than their optimism for the nation's educational system (50 percent), economy (46 percent) or its morals and ethics (41 percent).   And about half of all currently unmarried adults, 46 percent, say they want to get married. Among those unmarried who are living with a partner, the share rises to 64 percent.

Maybe you heard the old joke that asks, “Why is marriage like a hot bath?”  Answer:  “Because once you get in it, it isn’t so hot anymore!”

It’s easy to make fun of marriage, devalue it, and even disregard it.  Yet the Bible teaches that marriage is God’s gift to people who fall in love and want to raise a family.  It was always God’s plan to have marriage be the foundation of a healthy society.  This is why at Crosswalk we regularly teach about healthy relationships in the marriage.  It is also why we encourage live-in couples to please God by getting married, and come alongside them with loving care and counsel to make it as easy as possible for them do to so.

At the same time, the single life is also affirmed by God.  Our Lord Jesus was never married (although interestingly, the Bible repeatedly says that the church is his “bride”); and the apostle Paul said he gave up the right to have a believing wife for the sake of advancing the Kingdom of God.  There is no shame in being single, and no one is a second class citizen in the church of Jesus Christ.  In fact, of Crosswalk members, 60% are married and 40% are single.  We praise God for our singles, and apply most of our teaching on marriage in such a way that it is valuable for friendships as well.

I hope to see you in church this Sunday!!

Blessings,

Pastor John

Learning from Sex Trade Professionals

Dear Crosswalkers,

In our series, "Healthy Habits:  The Life God Blesses," we now come to relational health.  For the month of February, Lord willing, we will look at how to have healthy relationships, marriages, friendships, and families.  We kick it off this week with the fact that God wants to bless us with healthy relationships.  So many have fallen into dysfunctional patterns of relating to each other and they don't know that there is a way out.  This Lord's Day, we will look at what the Bible has to say about overcoming unhealthy relational patterns and getting on track for relational health.

To get us thinking about the virtues that lead to relational health, I want to share a compelling story from my recent reading What Good Is God?, by Philip Yancey.  Yancey writes about being invited to speak at a conference on ministry to women in prostitution, or as they prefer to be called, Sex Trade Professionals.  He had written a book on God's Grace, and they wanted him to speak on the subject.  After some discussion with his wife, Yancey agreed to accept the invitation on the condition that he could have the opportunity to question the women and hear their stories.  This is what he writes about the end of his conversations with the women:

I had time for one more question. "Did you know that Jesus referred to your profession? Let me read you what he said: 'I tell you the truth, the tax collectors and the prostitutes are entering the kingdom of God ahead of you.' He was speaking to the religious authorities of his day. What do you think Jesus meant? Why did he single out prostitutes?"

After several minutes of silence a young woman from Eastern Europe spoke up in her broken English. "Everyone, she has someone to look down on. Not us. We are at the low. Our families, they feel shame for us. No mother nowhere looks at her little girl and says, 'Honey, when you grow up I want you be good prostitute.' Most places, we are breaking the law. Believe me, we know how people feel about us. People call us names: whore, slut, hooker, harlot. We feel it too. We are the bottom. And sometimes when you are at the low, you cry for help. So when Jesus comes, we respond. Maybe Jesus meant that."

Yes.  Maybe Jesus meant exactly that!  Here is one key to relational health that we won't have time to cover this Sunday:  Humility.  Humility of heart and mind is one of the great secrets to having a healthy relationship with God and with others.  The NT says,

Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love(Ephesians 4:2).

...And all of you, serve each other in humility, for "God opposes the proud but favors the humble" (1 Peter 5:5).
Think about every relationship in your life.  Every one of them will be healthier if we add a heaping dose of humility!

I hope to see you Sunday!

Love in Jesus,

Pastor John Christie

Don't Believe the Big Screen

Dear Crosswalkers,

Last week I wrote about some of the books I've been reading.  One of them was chock full of amazing stories of faith.  Philip Yancey, in his book, What Good is God? writes about what it is like to listen to the words of Jesus in today's world.  He illustrates his point by telling about the 2004 Ukraine election in which the reformer Victor Yushchenko challenged the entrenched party. On election-day the exit polls showed Yushchenko with a comfortable lead, but through outright fraud, the government had reversed those results.

Yancey writes:

That evening the state-run television reported, "Ladies and gentlemen, we announce that the challenger Victor Yushchenko has been decisively defeated." However, government authorities had not taken into account one feature of Ukrainian television, the translation it provides for the hearing-impaired. On the small screen insert in the lower right-hand corner of the television screen a brave woman raised by deaf-mute parents gave a different message in sign language. "I am addressing all the deaf citizens of Ukraine. Don't believe what they say. They are lying, and I am ashamed to translate these lies. Yushchenko is our President!" No one in the studio understood her radical sign-language message.

Inspired by that courageous translator, deaf people led what became known as the Orange Revolution. Yancey continues:

They (the deaf community) text-messaged their friends on mobile phones about the fraudulent elections, and soon other journalists took courage … and likewise refused to broadcast the party line. Over the next few weeks as many as a million people wearing orange flooded the capital city of Kiev to demand new elections. The government finally buckled under the pressure, consenting to new elections, and this time Yushchenko emerged as the undisputed winner.

Yancey makes the following point:

Our society is hardly unique … like the sign language translator in the lower right-hand corner of the screen, along comes a person named Jesus who says in effect, "Don't believe the big screen—they're lying. It's the poor who are blessed, not the rich. Mourners are blessed too, as well as those who hunger and thirst, and the persecuted. Those who go through life thinking they're on top will end up on the bottom. And those who go through life feeling they're at the very bottom will end up on top. After all, what does it profit a person to gain the whole world and lose his soul?"

In our series, "Healthy Habits:  The Life God Blesses," we are being challenged to listen to the small screen and the life changing truth of our Lord Jesus.  We've seen how God wants to bless us spiritually, intellectually, financially, and this week we will look at what the Bible says about blessing us with physical health.  This will be a very practical study.  We will look at what God says about our bodies, and issues related to longevity, and the healing ministry of Jesus. I hope to see you in church, but if you can't come to church our Sunday messages are available for podcast on iTunes or can be downloaded from our website, crosswalkchurch.com.

Love in Jesus,

Pastor John Christie

Pastor’s Top 10 Predictions for 2011!

Dear Crosswalkers,

Here they are!!  My top 10 predictions for the New Year:
1. The Bible will still have all the answers.
2. Prayer will still be the most powerful thing on Earth.
3. The Holy Spirit will still move.
4. God will still honor the praises of His people.
5. There will still be God-anointed preaching.
6. There will still be singing of praise to God.
7. God will still pour out blessings upon His people.
8. There will still be room at the Cross for all who want to follow Jesus.
9. Jesus will still love you.
10. Jesus will still save the lost when they come to Him.

At the end of the year we will review this to see how accurate my predications were, but I have a strong feeling these are rock solid predictions that cannot fail, because ultimately I’m not the one who made them, but God did in the Bible!
“But the word of the Lord remains forever.” And that word is the Good News that was preached to you. – 1 Peter 1:25

This Sunday we are starting the New Year with a great new series of studies called, HEALTHY HABITS – THE LIFE GOD BLESSES. This will be a 2 month series of messages on how to cultivate healthy habits that will lead to a blessed life.  Over and over the Bible speaks of God blessing the lives of those who love him.  But many seem to miss out on those blessings.  Why?  This series will explore the keys to living a life God blesses!  And this first Sunday of the New Year is a crucial kickoff to this series.  We will also renew our covenant with God and celebrate the Lord’s Supper together!

See you in church!

Love in Jesus,

Pastor John Christie

Soul Food

Dear Crosswalkers,Last Sunday we got off to a great start on our series, “Healthy Habits:  The Life God Blesses.”  In the future we will be looking at the various ways God wants to bless our lives.  This Sunday pastor Ed Taylor is going to help us get focused on becoming spiritually healthy with a message entitled, “All I Have is a Little Prayer” from Matthew 6: 9-11.  I encourage you to read this passage before coming to worship! Leanna and I will be off this week and next to visit our family in Costa Rica.  God has given grandparents a wonderful role in blessing their grandchildren with godly wisdom and spiritual values.  This is a role we enjoy thoroughly! I am praying that 2011 will be a year of blessing for Crosswalk Community Church.  Please join me in that prayer.  Here are some goals for 2011 for you to consider in your quiet time this week: 1.     Trust in the Power of Prayer So he said to me, “This is the word of the Lord…‘Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,’ says the Lord Almighty." (Zechariah 4:6, NIV) 2.     Get more intentional about sharing my faith. I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some. (I Corinthians 9:22, NIV) 3.     Take time to care for my soul. Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. (Philippians 3:12, NIV) 4.     Confront bad habits and ingrained patterns of sin. Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. (Hebrews 12:1, NIV) 5.     Do the hard work needed to have healthy relationships. If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. (Matthew 18:15, NIV) 6.     Quit comparing myself to others. Turning his head, Peter noticed the disciple Jesus loved following right behind.  When Peter noticed him, he asked Jesus, “Master, what’s going to happen to him?” Jesus said, “If I want him to live until I come again, what’s that to you? You—follow me.” That is how the rumor got out among the brothers that this disciple wouldn’t die. But that is not what Jesus said. He simply said, “If I want him to live until I come again, what’s that to you?” (John 21:20-23, Msg) 7.   Prioritize my family. A leader must be well-thought-of, committed to his wife… attentive to his own children and having their respect. For if someone is unable to handle his own affairs, how can he take care of God’s church? (I Timothy 3:2-5, Msg) 8.   Stay focused on the vision of a Spirit-filled community. They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer.  Everyone was filled with awe, and many wonders and miraculous signs were done by the apostles.  All the believers were together and had everything in common.  Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need.  Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved. (Acts 2:42-47, NIV) “O God, may these values fill my heart and mind!” Love in Jesus, Pastor John Christie

JOHN WESLEY'S PRAYER FOR COVENANT RENEWALHere is the prayer we prayed together last Sunday: Lord, Let me be your servant, under your command. I will no longer be my own. I will give up myself to your will in all things. Lord, make me what you will. I put myself fully into your hands: put me to doing, put me to suffering, let me be employed for you, or laid aside for you, let me be full, let me be empty, let me have all things, let me have nothing. I freely and with a willing heart give it all to your pleasure and disposal. Before all heaven and earth, I here acknowledge you as my Lord and God. I take you, Father, Son and Holy Spirit, for my portion, and vow to give up myself, body and soul, as your servant, to serve you in holiness and righteousness all the days of my life. Father, I do here on bended knees accept Christ as the only new and living Way, and sincerely join myself in a covenant with Him. O blessed Jesus, I come to you, hungry, sinful, miserable, blind, and naked, unworthy even to wash the feet of your servants. I do here, with all my power, accept you as my Lord. I renounce my own worthiness, and vow that you are the Lord, my righteousness. I renounce my own wisdom, and take you for my only guide. I renounce my own will, and take your will as my law. I renew my covenant with you, Heavenly Father, in the name of Jesus my Lord, Amen.